Thank the gods, I am not completely unemployed! 😀 We are still on the payroll an we will continue to be so as long as they can. So for the time being I don’t have to completely freak the hell out about money.
I’m still going to keep writing and posting as many stories as I can while I’m out and or course cleaning. I’ve already cleared away enough trash to make the garbage men give our house strange looks… XD But hey! Less clutter! 😀 And school is hoping to be open on Wednesday so things are getting back to a sort of normal here.
I’m sure you’ll all be sick of posts about Sandy but yes, since Lenni lives on the East Coast, I’m still cleaning up from the storm. We lost a bunch of food and were in the dark for a couple days but we are lucky to be back up and running right now. The worst that happened to me personally was a tree branch landed on the top of my car and dented it a little. I have pictures but…
I know not much went wrong by me but I’m still in a sate of shock. I have had very dear friends of mine lose EVERYTHING and the library where I work will be closed indefinitely. I don’t sleep too well and I’ve been tired and depressed. Every time I venture out for food, I see gas lines for miles, tress on people’s houses, and the persistent hum of those lucky enough to have a generator.
Without my job, I feel like I have no purpose. But I’m making the best use of my time by cleaning out clutter from the house and writing as much as I can. It’s not even about the short story experiment anymore or the blog project or anything like that. Aside for filing for unemployment, I need to have some other money coming in till I can get my job back.
It’ll be a long time before we can get back to normal but it’ll happen.
I plan to watch that documentary tonight and reading the promos and looking at books along the same lines and it’s got me thinking: I don’t see much on women who have kids, work full time, and THEN try to cram their creative outlets in any spare few seconds they can find. Not that I’m the type to go scraping at new frontiers or look down on stay at home moms who try and fit their art in around their kids, but working full time with kids AND striving to keep your creative fire is an entirely different kettle of fish.
Who who the hell do I think I am? Ballz out, I want to say, "Whoever the fuck I want, bitchez!" Ahhh, if only life were that simple. First off, I LOVE my job. I don’t want to quit. In fact, the thought of quitting my job to pursue my dream is shooting myself in the foot. Librarianship is PART of my dream. It helps me be who I am as much as writing and drawing so why the heck would I give it up? And d00d, all the books I can get my grubby little hands on for FREE! I’d be stupid to give this up. Second, I don’t DO stay at home mom. I practically went batshit crazy on maternity leave and that was even with the hope of going back to work. You think the Lenni is crazy NOW, she’d be Yellow Wallpaper crazy under the yoke of housewifery. Other women can do it, I can’t. I like having a career. It makes me feel independent and useful.
I get a LOT of questions from other women in my life asking me how I was able to complete a novel, start another one, write a bevy of short stories, keep a full time job, have a side business, draw, and all the while being around the kid enough for her to still remember what I look like. And I have no idea. To try and figure that out (and as a cheap gimmick to pry more blog posts out of me) I’m starting Mommy Monday. The lovely trials and tribulations of how the bloody hell I manage all this with out being on mood elevators or booze.
There are many times in my life where I really just sit and wonder if there are any other women like me who not only have a Third Shift; but a fourth or quite possibly a fifth. If you find any, point them the way here. I’d certainly love to know who they are.