atthequillsmercy

Today’s Workout: It’s gonna take more work…

Since my knee isn’t back to 100%, I decided to take it very, VERY easy and stick with the desk peddler and only do 30 minutes. I tell ya, my thighs sure didn’t remember doing this. That’s a good thing. I want my body to get used to workouts again. Until I can walk without feeling my knee twinge, this is what I’ll have to be doing.

I’ve been experimenting with some meals again. I tried some marinated chicken thigh in Japanese cabbage, ground chicken in my Itaki lunches, and using arugula instead of spinach in that pasta dish I like to make. I’m on the lowest dose of Saxenda for now. My weight did go back up to 216, and I’m not happy about that. I can’t be helped, though, since I could barely walk, much less go for a run. My nails are almost completely back to normal, and despite the fact I’m certain my blood work will be shitty since I couldn’t do any cardio, I don’t think I’m doing too badly for someone who wrenched a knee. So far, this month has been far less cursed than last month. I’m sure I’ll be able to make up for it.

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WIP Wednesday: Gettin’ Crafty!

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Since my writing progress has mostly been outlining, editing, and publishing, I don’t have much in the way of word counts. I’ve been working on another one of my goals: Stashbusting.

I’m still working on that really big blanket for my bed (which is why I don’t care if that stain is on it) and a scarf to put up in my shop. I plan to put a fluffy, gray border on that once it’s long enough. It’s easy to do while I’m waiting for Draft2Digital to finish uploading all my stuff to publish, or in between the people going in and out of my house for the repairs. The rest of this week is back to writing since I’m completely caught up with publishing the stories I have finished. It may look like I’m spreading myself thin with doing all these income-producing activities all at once: The blog, needlework, and writing… And you are correct. I am exhausted, but I am desperate. Paying for all this has drained away my savings, and I’m too proud to borrow money. So, I’m busting my ass to make the money myself. I have a bunch of overtime coming up at work, my knee is feeling better, so I can do things on the desk bike, and I outlined a bunch more prompts to work on. I can’t count on my home insurance company not to screw me over. I’ll sleep when I’m out of debt.

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Lenni Reviews: “A Star Brighter than the Sun” Vol. 4, by Kazune Kawahara

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*This book was given to me in exchange for an honest review.

Sae decides to confess to Koki at the school festival, but it all goes wrong, and Koki ends up comforting another girl.

This dragged, going back and forth with trying to find the right moment to confess while prepping for the school festival, and we’re no closer to that by the end of the volume. It felt like we were just circling, and that could have been summed up in a couple of pages, not an entire volume. I’m not a fan of stretching out something like this so long, and I don’t feel like the story moved forward. I feel meh about the whole volume. 3 out of 5.

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Happy Birthday to me!

I turned 45 today! And while I need February to enter slowly with its hands up to show me it’s not as much of a threat as January, I did treat myself to delicious food I haven’t had in a long time. After this, I’m doing a no-spend month while I recover financially from all the stuff going on with the house. If it’s not bills or groceries (or book covers, cause that’s an investment), I’m not buying it.

As for how 45 is going to go, I would like to get healthier. All the stress has been hell on my sleeping patterns, my skin, my weight… In a way, I’m almost glad I have a root canal tomorrow because I am going to make sure my body is taken care of from here on out. And it’s not to be skinny or whatever, it’s to age strong. One of my biggest fears is a lack of autonomy. Not that I want to climb Everest at 6o; I just want to be able to still be self-sufficient. Once the weather turns, I’ll be going outside more – even if fuckwits jeer at me when I run – drinking less booze, and I’m back on my Saxenda at the lowest dose. I’ll also be trying to update the blog more. It’s gonna be interesting, and I hope fulfilling over the next few months. Wish me luck!

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WIP Wednesday: At least its fixable?

This is all the stuff that’s been going on at home. All the moldy gross stuff is out and as soon as the old pipes are replaced, the contractors will come in and fix everything up. I am absolutely of the mindset of “God is testing me and I did NOT study.” I am consoling myself with the fact that once this stuff is fixed, I won’t have a ticking timebomb in my basement. But, enough complaining. Here are the numbers:

  1. Longer Smut: 14,118
  2. Short Smut Prompts: 406 (5 prompts complete, 4 published)
  3. Dewey: 15,699

I took time out for editing to release the short smut as often as I can (no more than once a week). I can’t write and edit at the same time, sadly. I’ve taken advantage of a sale at bookcovers.com for these to save some money since that’s my biggest expense when it comes to self-publishing. I self edit, so any mistakes you see are totally on me. I try not to drive myself crazy editing those since they’re not my passion projects. I also try not to take any low reviews on that stuff to heart, either. 

I have another long day of repairs coming up and hopefully things will be back to normal for a bit. It’s hard to be creative when you’re in constant fight or flight mode.

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WIP Wednesday: Am I Cursed?

I am at that point where I would love for shit to stop going wrong, but also like “That all you got? Bring it on, bitch.”

If you’ve been keeping up with my posts on Bluesky, things are just all bullshit right now. I had a leak in the basement, and by “leak”, I mean it sounded like water was POURING out onto the floor if I ran the washing machine. I called the emergency plumbers, who not only found that the main line in the house was backed up, but my water heater also had a slow leak, was rusted out at the bottom, and the venting failed at the top. Hadda get a replacement. And since there was water, I had to have a remediation team come in, and THEY discovered not only mold but asbestos. Come Monday, I head to work and hit a massive pothole. Popped the tire, ruined the rim, and my struts. Got a tow to the repair place, which also noticed a leaking oil pan and bad brakes.

Things are fixed now, but the plumber (they were SO nice) also noticed that most of the pipes are old and will need replacing. I can’t even think about that right now. Between the house and the car, I’m 10k more in debt. Those pipes will have to wait for their turn.

One upside to this was that being trapped for 5 hours at the repair shop gave me plenty of writing time until the battery on Shelley died. I named my Freewrite Traveler “Shelley.” Because I’m a big fucking nerd. Anyway, here are the numbers.

  • Smut: 14,118 words
  • Kinktober prompts: 112 words (Finished prompt 5 and published the 3rd prompt, meaning I’ve published 3 out of the completed 5 prompts)
  • Dewey: 15,699 words

I’ve also been catching up on my ARCs and reviews. Since prompt 5 is finished, I’ll spend some time editing that. Editing doesn’t take that long. All of these prompts hover around 3-5 pages (8.5/11). It’s just a matter of making sure the details are right, and I find as many typos as possible. I’ve put needlework and running aside for a bit. I’ll have to start fresh with that once all this repair stuff is done. Wish me luck! Apparently, I need it!

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Workout Weekly Recap: FFS

Every time I feel like I’m getting back on track, something happens. I was hoping to get back into workouts on the weekend mornings, but instead, there was a leak in the basement, and I spent the whole day dealing with plumbers, home insurance, and water damage remediation. Over the next couple days; repairs and a new water heater. Oh lovely! I can’t wait to add 7k to my debt (if the home insurance decides to jerk me around). But it did feel good to get moving on the days I was able to. I can’t really complain about that.

I’m varying my food some more by trying out spinach in my Itaki meals, and it’s okay. I’d rather have broccoli or bok choy. The timing is better for cooking, and it’s more filling for me. I managed to get some ground bison on sale and made some chili (while the nice men were working in my shitty basement). The pasta dish was a way to use up those cherry tomatoes and spinach before they went bad, and it was actually pretty good! It was just butter, olive oil, pasta water, and parmesan cheese. Creamier than I’m used to but I’d totally make that again. I’m more in favor of setting up the slow cooker so I can do other things. I guess in a way it was a good thing the leak happened on a rare weekend I wasn’t working… 

This coming week is also going to be a mess. At least to start. Things will go back to normal once the new water heater is installed. At least I hope.

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WIP Wednesday: New Goals

I get way too much use outta this GIF…

I was watching this YouTube video and a lot of the complaints in it I am totally feeling: Underpaid, underappreciated, overworked… And with no end in sight. I’m sure my bestie will scold me for overworking myself, but I am upping my daily word goal from 2k to 5k. Doesn’t matter that I usually don’t make 2k, I’m doing it. I am just so sick and tired of struggling. I shouldn’t have to turn the heat off in certain rooms of the house to save money. I’m also concerned about where the government is going and if my insurance will even cover my son’s surgery anymore. I mean, they probably will, but who knows these days!? Everything is so uncertain…

I’ll still be working on the blog and needlework, but writing will be the priority. Let’s get to the numbers, as they say on Dead Meat:

  • Smut: 13,540
  • Short smut: 882
  • Dewey: 15,588

These are my starting points for the day, and I’ll try to make a habit of tallying up my words at the end of the day. I’d like to put the total words added in each WIP post to hold myself accountable. I will also give myself grace if I need to spend a day or two editing. Maybe with a higher output overall, I’ll have more stories to publish and pick up some members on my Patreon. I have a book I’ve been using for outlines to write faster. I was also talking with my bestie about some new ideas I’ve had, and I can’t get to those until I finish what I’ve got. And I gotta say, she’s my hypewoman but will absolutely tell me if one of my ideas is shit. That’s why she’s my bestie.

I guess see ya’ll in a week to see how this goes.

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Today’s Workout: Welcome to January

Yeah, the January workout posts. Guilty as charged. But, as I did this, I could tell that I hadn’t lost much strength from not working out for a while. This was challenging but not impossible. Not every day should or can be a cardio day, no matter how much I enjoy running while I’m doing it.

I’ve been having fun with random meals and doing my best to try and have something light for breakfast. I usually don’t eat breakfast at all. And of course, I made a big ass pork shoulder for New Year’s that will be in a few more meals. I’m upping my veggies and protein most of the time since I’m still working on my goal for all ten fingernails to be completely attached. It’s just the ring fingers that need to grow out now. That’s so freaky… That’s why I want to wean off the Saxenda at some point.

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2026 Goals

Ah, it’s that time of year again, where I reflect on what a trash fire this year was and think I can have better next year. Let’s keep this shit simple:

  1. Lose 20 pounds and lower or stop Saxenda
  2. Stashbusting yarn
  3. Read more of the physical ARCs in my house
  4. Finish Dewey and Emma

I am hesitant to stay on the weight loss drugs much longer. The research on these in the long term isn’t much and I worry about it. I was weak and did buy some yarn this year; mostly either on clearance or for a specific project I’m working on. I have this queen-sized blanket I’ve been crocheting for YEARS and I needed more yarn for that. I still have so many books at home that I’d like to read and donate. I also had an inspiration for the book I want to write that will follow Emma and I refuse to start it until I finish what I have. I’ll be posting more reviews as well so, be ready for that.

I’m sure I’ll think of other things I’d like to do in 2026 but these are the ones I’m going to focus on. There’s no sense in having a CVS receipt of goals only to end up abandoning a chunk of them. My Patreon has the first chapters of my two current WIPs for free and if I get some patrons, I’ll start posting more there again. No screaming into the void, I’ll only post if there’s an audience.

My books over at Smashwords are still on sale here, and a huge thank you so SO much if you’ve purchased and given my work a chance. It means a lot to me! 

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