Finally Watched It: “Hail Satan?” (2019)

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In this documentary, The Satanic Church goes toe to toe with various government boards in order to promote Satanism as a counterpoint to religion seeping into politics.

This doesn’t play about with the hypocrisy of religion in politics when a minority religion seeks to be represented. Every time the Satanic Church said “Hey, we’d love to put up our monument too!” in every case, the choice was made to not display anything.

But if you’re expecting something that’s all gung ho against religion, you won’t find it here. This is surprisingly fair-minded; even when the Satanists had to wear fucking bulletproof vests to protect themselves in public due to death threats. It makes me wonder they don’t have the support of other minority religions but that wasn’t the point of the documentary. I’d recommend this if you’re interested in contemporary politics.

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Pagan Blog Project – “R” for “Retribution”

Ma always taught me living well is the best revenge. In a way, she was right.

There is always something in you that wants the big confrontation after a fight; the epic conclusion worthy of the final episode of a TV drama. I’ve had those and let me tell you, they are so not worth the trouble. There is nothing soul cleansing about them. Every confrontation has left me weary and soiled. It didn’t matter if I was “right” or if it mended a broken friendship, there was still a sense something once in one piece would never be right again.

Sometimes when something ends, it ends for a reason. There is no real benefit to getting even or getting the last word. For me, the best revenge is to forget the whole thing. As a wise friend of mine said: “Don’t let them rent space in your head.” They’re not worth it.

Pagan Blog Project – “P” for “Practice”

Like many spiritual people, I try to see my faith as something I live, not something I do. I frequently question if I’m Pagan enough because I don’t go to many functions, I barely have time for proper rituals, I forget when the holidays are, and I can never remember correspondences off the top of my head. I always have to look them up.

So, if the proof is in the practice, what makes me a Pagan?

When I stargaze, I believe I am practicing. When I teach my little girl respect for the earth, I believe I am practicing. When I sit and take a breath, admiring how the air smells like grass and flowers, I believe I am practicing. It’s in these moments where we can all stop wondering if we’re Pagan enough and just enjoy the world.

Pagan Blog Project – “N” for “Name”

Like many other Pagans, I assigned myself a magical name. It is a name only to be used between you and your deities; perhaps within your coven. I agonized over what it should be and even had the initials tattooed on my back.

I’ll be straight up with you all, I barely use it. I don’t regret the tattoo and the name fits me but honestly, in my spiritual practice, my very being resonates with my identity. Names are not important. Like I mentioned before, my practice stripped to it’s purest form is all about intent.

So, I posit the question to my Pagan fans and readers of this blog, how does your magical name (if you have one) factor into your practice?

Pagan Blog Project – “J” for “Just”

Notice the above is not “justice.” I am referring here to what feels “right” and what is “fair.” I am big believer in what is fair, and this may not be what justice IS to many people. It is enough for me to have the man who cheated on me unable to be with anyone else no matter how hard he tries. I don’t wish for the lawyer who tried to screw me over to lose his practice; I want someone to do to him what he tried to do to me. I don’t wish the same pain, I wish frustration to the same tune as my own because I believe that would be just if not necessarily justice.

I suppose part of me sees “justice” as “revenge.” But there in lies the added bonus of a punishment. While all actions have consequences, in a spiritual sense, I am not a fan of punishment. If you cause someone hurt, the consequence should be equal to but no greater than the original offense.

Well, sure I say this now but watch. Next time my kid talks back, I’ll yell a lot longer than the time it took to sass me. XD

Pagan Blog Project – “I” for “Initiation”

As a solitary, I am “self-initiated.” That’s pretty much the entire story. Pagans can (and have) sit around all day debating if that “counts” or not but you know what? Who cares? You walk the path, it’s what you are. So many churches squabble about little details, splinter off or try to annihilate each other. Do we really want to walk that line?

I did a formal ritual to initiate myself but I was practicing long before I did. Just like my marriage, I never felt I needed something “official” to declare my love to my husband or my gods. The paper’s nice and it comes with it’s perks, but without it, me and him would still be a loving couple and good parents. And I would still be a tree hugging, dirt worshiper. 😉

Pagan Blog Project – “C” is for “Coven”

I have been tempted to join with a couple of witchy friends for a working but I have never wanted to join an existing coven. Like many Pagans, I wasn’t raised in the faith. Ma sent me to an African Methodist Episcopal church till I was old enough to say didn’t want to go anymore.

There was nothing in particular that turned me off to this church. Eventually we moved into a new neighborhood and I never found a new one. I was more comfortable being Christian alone than in a group. That feeling carried over when I discovered Wicca and late when I decided the more general label of Pagan suited me better.

As an introvert and a person diagnosed with alexithymia, I find I have a better experience with my religion on my own. Sometimes I think it would be cool to at least have someone to talk to but that’s why the interwebz exist. 😉

Pagan Blog Project – “C” for Cartomancy

My mother, who said my being Pagan was cool as long as I didn’t “do anything to the cat,” is the one who bought me my first deck of tarot cards. Such things were a favored gift from others for awhile (till I begged people to stop giving them to me) but this deck was the first (and for awhile ONLY) deck to work for me.

In fact, cards are the only divination method to work for me at all. o_O I’ve tried runes, boards, scrying, but not the I-Ching because I heard it involves math and I have taken great pains in my life to avoid evil number wizardry whenever I can. 😉

The way I do readings for myself (or anyone else if they ask me all pretty like) is by shuffling the cards and asking “What would be the outcome if ______?” And I use most frequently The Navigator’s Tarot of the Mystic Sea (the one my Ma bought me) and I lay them out in a three row spread which looks like an arrow. Each line is the past, present, and future.  I’ve gotten some pretty good insights in things using this method and I like it because it tells me if I continue on the current path, this is what is most likely to happen. It’s changeable. I don’t desire to know the future, per se, I want to be warned if I’m about to step in a pothole.

The only other deck I use is the Dragon Tarot. I bought this deck because it mystically felt… Oh, because dragons are awesome. >D This deck also works for me (I have stopped buying decks now) and I use the same spread. I have a book of tarot spreads but the arrow formation works so I am the most familiar with that one.

As for which deck I use and when, it’s totally random. I think “Hey, it’d be nice to use the dragon one today.” Sometimes I do three card day readings but not all the time. Honestly, I’m lucky I leave the house on time most mornings so stopping to do a tarot reading isn’t… In the cards.

You know I had to make that joke once. 😉

Pagan Blog Project – “A” for “Aspirations”

I often see many Pagans talking very deeply about their practice; putting into words what I have only experienced in instinct and feelings. I usually end up feeling not Pagan ENOUGH to be qualified to post about how I feel, what I’m doing, what corresponds to what, etc. Which always begs the question: “What do I aspire to in being Pagan?”

I want to feel connected to the world and the energy within it. I want to fly without wings, I want to see magic in everything. I want something meaningful to turn to when times are tough and to celebrate when times are good. I want a group when I need it and solitude when I don’t. I aspire to spiritual freedom and peace. And that’s gonna have to be Pagan enough. 🙂