Patron: “Your computers are old. You should get a grant! Just call *J. Q. Important Guy* ! I know him personally. It’s so easy. You should just do it.”

OMG!! You’re kidding! As a public institution who’s current “old” computers were paid for by a grant, we never thought of that! And grant money must just be falling out of the sky right now seeing as libraries everywhere are cutting hours/people/salaries/closing entirely. /sarcasm

Note: When librarian tells you three times “We’re working on it.” we are in fact, working on it. Money does not fall out of the sky for new computers. T_T