movie

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Finally Watched It: “Dark City” (1998)

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In this dystopian scifi, John Murdoch finds himself with no memory in a strange room with a dead body. Mysterious figures in dark coats are on his trail as he discovers a dark conspiracy about what happens to the people around him and the city at night.

Just from the first ten minutes, I could already tell this was going to be a movie I need to watch more than once to really get it. From the way the story is told and presented, it is subtle, beautiful, and scary. From what little I to know about how to make movies, this is framed and shot AMAZINGLY well.

I just don’t understand why this isn’t more popular. Right away, it felt like Bioshock hacked The Matrix and demanded the movies become smarter and more subtle. It really highlighted for me what I have noticed about mainstream media; it’s all dumbed down, loud, sanitized, safe, drivel that doesn’t bother to challenge your brain at all. When you finally sit and watch something like this, it’s such a breath of fresh air. It ticked off every geek switch I have and I can’t wait to watch it again.

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Finally Watched It: “Serial Mom”

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This movie is about a seemingly normal housewife and mother who is… Enthusiastic about defending her home and family. Hijinks abound…

I was cracking up at this movie. I was left with the immediate feeling of wanting to rename this movie “First World Problems: The Revenge” and holy shit, is it ever funny. It’s twisted, it’s over the top, it’s violent, and I loved every minute of it. I don’t even wanna go into detail because if you like dark comedy, you will get a kick out of this movie.

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Finally Watched It: “The Poker House”

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As a fan of Channel Awesome, I saw this movie in a Top 10 Jennifer Lawrence performances and since I’d never heard of it, I thought I would check this movie out.

This movie is supposedly based on a true story but I tend to take that with a grain of salt because filmmaking as a whole as made a complete whore of that sentence. However, even if this story is entirely false or entirely true, the young actors – including Lawrence – are absolutely amazing. I found it very compelling how the characters managed to patch together this strange hodgepodge of a support system with the few decent adults they know around the town. And with what little I know about how movies are made, this is shot and paced really well.

It’s not exactly a happy movie but this reminded me of a happier version of Once Were Warriors. It was worth a watch even though I needed a pick me up afterward.

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Finally Watched It: “The Amityville Horror” (1979)

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This is one of those classic horror movies that just sorta flew under my radar until I started my little Finally Watched It list. If you don’t know the story, it’s about a newlywed couple who moves into a house that’s haunted.

I wouldn’t call this movie subtle by any means but it is more subtle than the remake. If I had to pick between the two, I would pick the older one because I personally feel the atmosphere is better here; especially with the father character who is slowly being driven mad. Neither version is bad, I just feel the older one had more charm to it. It was more menacing than outright scary and I think horror can do with more of that than jump scares and gore. I’m glad I was able to cross this off my list.

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Finally Watched It: Die Hard

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Die Hard was always one of those movies in my orbit that I could never quite catch from the beginning and be able to watch it straight though to the end. Not because I didn’t enjoy it; something would always interrupt me. So, this being the holiday season, I grabbed this movie and finally sat down to watch it.

This film is so 80’s it’s comical. It’s everything an action movie was back then that’s not the same today: smart, funny, impressive, exploitative, and thrilling all at the same time. You get random boobz, explosions, blood, guns and man is it ever fun! I had a great time watching it but I can see how I wouldn’t catch this right when it came out. I was really young and in my phase where I was so into cartoons, I had a grudge against Bewitched for having an animated intro but not being an animated show (I got over that eventually).

I absolutely think that is would have been so cool for the nanny to tell the press to fuck off when they went to McClaine’s family’s house. What I wouldn’t have given to see her say “I’m legal, idiot.” and slam the door in his smug little face. But tropes gotta trope, I guess.

I’m not sure about going through the sequels to this as I personally have little faith in sequels living up to the original. I’m sure glad I saw this one, though.

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Finally Watched It: “The Haunting” (1963)

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Dr. John Markway in an attempt to gather research on the paranormal gathers people who have claimed to have supernatural encounters to stay with him in a haunted house and document what happens. Among them are Luke; a skeptical underachiever who hopes to sell the house one day, Theodora; a clairvoyant, and Eleanore; a psychic who becomes attuned to the spirits in the house.

Now, that I’ve seen the original, I can see why the remake was a flop. This version is subtle and unnerving; relying on the slow build of the character’s backstories to prepare you for what’s to come. The people are relatable and I love how it’s shot. This is just wonderfully done.

Rather than rely on jump scares, this movie instead blurs the line between what is supernatural and what is inside Eleanore’s head. I think I prefer a horror movie leaving me unsettled and off balance rather than going out of its way to startle me. There’s also this sadness to it and expects more from the audience.

Smartly done, I’m glad I went back and watched this one!

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Underrated Movies: “The Great Mouse Detective”

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I’ve been on a kick lately of making my kid watch the movies I grew up with to see if she likes them and if I still get any enjoyment out of them. We’ve done Return to Oz, Secret of NIMH, Jurassic Park, Labyrinth, and Flight of the Navigator so far. It’s been one heck of a trip for me, let me tell you. When I remembered this title, I couldn’t wait to pop it in.

Watching it now, it is certainly darker than I remember. When Olivia’s father is kidnapped, it’s scary, Rattigan orders one of his henchmen eaten alive by a cat, that henchman is shown drinking and is quite obviously drunk off his ass, Basil smokes AND drinks beer and there’s this part that I TOTALLY forgot about:

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Let’s face it; she’s a burlesque dancer.

She does a frikkin strip tease. That’s what it is. No sugar coating.

I am not saying these are bad things by any means but none of this would fly in a kid’s movie today. However, this sadly overlooked Disney film is so much fun and it’s a shame it’s not mentioned more often. There’s just something about older kid’s movies (some of them anyway) that seemed to expect more from the kids in the audience. Basil’s flagrant use of science, math, and SAT level vocabulary are offset by his huge ego and selfishness. Rattigan is genuinely frightening but he’s voiced by Vincent Price. He HAS to be scary then. Dawson is the perfect foil for Basil and Olivia isn’t just an annoying kid; she tries her best for just a child. The animation is beautiful, the story has layers I didn’t see before as a kid, and man I could SO see a spin-off TV series with this.

All in all, great movie that is just fun, heartwarming, and well done. It even got me talking about Sherlock Holmes, which now my kid wants to read. And hey, if a movie is good enough to inspire a 9 year old to read classic literature, I’m all for it.

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Finally Watched It: “Jurassic World”

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Well… This movie happened.

I had so many issues trying to get into this movie because there were so many failures in logic, I was grumbling under my breath for most of the running time.

  • People don’t seem to get bored going to regular zoos, I take issue with the public at large getting bored with fucking dinosaurs.
  • Why can’t a man and a woman have a working relationship – even a cantankerous one – without a romantic subplot? You could have cut that out all together and it would have been fine.
  • Why is it a thing in moves to ignore the expert when said expert was called in for help in the first place? His/her answer may not be the one you want but it is what you called them in to do!!!
  • Weaponizing dinosaurs is stupid. Aside for the fact there are plenty of existing animals that can be used for this purpose; wouldn’t it just be cheaper to do so? This side plot could have been cut. Morons who cannot and should not be in charge of a theme park is bad enough. You don’t have to bring in Evil Military Trope Man into the mess.
  • How do you not evacuate the park immediately? Is this in a universe where terrorism doesn’t exist and there is no sense of urgency to protect the public? We live in a reality where a city block radius is cleared for a suspicious package. You can’t get away with this kind of oversight in a movie anymore.
  • And speaking of which, there’s no evacuation plan?! What if it’s something simple like a hurricane is coming? How do you not have a solid evacuation plan in a place filled with man eating animals on an island!!? Regular island resorts and parks have plans for this without the added risk of being eaten by one of the attractions.

The bad-ass fight at the end it was saved this movie. If you cut out all the drama and massive failures in management I would have enjoyed it more but WOW! Very awesome.

I’d be ok with not making another one, though…

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Finally Watched It: “Seven Samurai” (1954)

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After watching Magnificent Seven, of course I was going to go back and watch the movie it was based on. Not to mention my Ma, gods rest her, LOVED Toshirô Mifune an Akira Kurosawa; so it’s way passed time I checked this movie off my list.

I tried not to compare it too much but there were some obvious differences. This movie is longer, the town has more trouble finding help, the villagers are more desperate and therefore more likely to be less perfect and innocent, the samurai themselves aren’t so noble, and the battle itself goes on for days. Overall, it’s less polished, making it feel more realistic despite some of the really hammy way people died.

The 1960 movie had this Hollywood feeling to it; like it knew it was a movie so it was more of an adventure. This movie seemed much more depressing to me. War is awful and killing sucks, the end. More people die and it ends on this low, regretful note. I don’t see this as a bad thing at all but I needed some humor after this to lift my spirits.

Also to note, Kyuzo is every badass samurai manga character rolled into one awesome package. If we could get some movies about him, I would watch it in a heartbeat.

Overall, I can see why I didn’t want to sit and watch this as a kid with Ma (although I regret that now) because I think a kid would get bored or not get a lot of what the characters are talking about. But now? Now, it is a beautiful example of movie making done right. Absolutely stellar.

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Finally Watched It: “Cube Zero”

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Where the last one has this intelligence to it, this one went from cerebral to gore fest right away. I know it’s a prequel but it was not as fun as the first two. I got a heavy “we’re all in the matrix” vibe or like with the Umbrella Corporation where everyone works for them whether they know it or not. The way this movie tied into the first was smart (no gonna spoil it) but on the whole, it leaves much to be desired. And it certainty had a lot to live up to considering how much I liked the first two.

Usually it’s the third movie where a series needs to stop and this is no exception. I wasn’t as entertained or thrilled as the previous ones and I’m glad they stopped here.

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